How They Keep You Comfortable, Quiet… And Mediocre
162: They don't know what they are doing.
After going over this post… We have realized that this should be divided into two parts due to its complexity and length. Our advice is to take your time. Go through it. Try to compare it with things you have witnessed. That is how you are going to get the most out of this read. Enjoy your weekend.
Welcome reader! No one can deny that society pushes you into mediocrity. How? Bad advice. Outdated advice. Things that used to work but no longer make much sense. You get the idea... When taking advice from someone, you must be careful. Not just because it might be irrelevant for your situation. But because it could push you into mediocrity. The worst part? They don't even know what mediocrity means.
What does this post cover?
Why most end up living mediocre lives without ever realizing it
Childhood programming and how it affects you
Hidden traps
Three-step framework to run laps around others
Real life scenarions
It’s a disease. Nobody thinks or feels or cares any more. Nobody gets excited or believes in anything except their own comfortable little God damn mediocrity. -Richard Yates
Mediocrity, Programming, Lives Others Live Around You
Additional reading on the mediocrity:
Childhood programming: Most of your beliefs, ideas, and limitations have been with you since you were a child. Some would say it was your parents, while others would say it was everything else around you (kindergarten, teachers, friends). It is impossible to pinpoint. It doesn't matter when you think about it. What matters is that you recognize you are the product of your environment. Most don’t want to admit it. But there is a good reason you are the way you are today, because being exposed to those influences has programmed you. This is also one of the main reasons why people from low-income backgrounds struggle with certain things. Being unable to pick models early in life or not having them, as they never had the opportunity to learn from others… Results in poor performance. Why do most lotto winners go broke after winning hundreds of millions? This is part of the reason. You can’t blame them, as they have been programmed poorly.
Mediocrity: Look around you, and you will get all the answers you are looking for. Society pushes you to mediocrity. How? Before you think to yourself, it is all about some grandmaster evil plot strategy… It is not. It is because those around you didn't know any better themselves, or are operating on outdated ideas that once worked. Not taking into account how the world is changing and how massive technological advancements every decade influence opportunities for everyone.
1980s - Personal Computers
1990s - First mobile phones
2000s - Internet becoming massively available, social media (MySpace)
2010s - e-commerce becoming a thing, Touch screens are the new normal, massive growth of social media
2020s - Cloud computing, AI, Blockchain
Could the advice given 40-50 years ago still be relevant? We all know the answer… What happens when everyone follows the same outdated advice? Mediocrity. Just by these alone, we could wrap it up. Making it clear why most operate from wrong principles. On top of that, add a bunch of agenda (propaganda), and things start to make a lot more sense. Another question to ask yourself is what happens when life becomes comfortable? People stop making logical decisions. This is one of the main reasons why most people struggle so much with their choices, and making a few wrong ones early in life sets you up for maximum pain. Offloading your cognitive tasks to society, friends, or gurus who themselves have not done any good. Let’s take the example of someone telling you to go to college and pick any path. Since you didn’t want to do it in the first place, and never had good grades. You decide on the lowest barrier of entry - romance literature. Well, at least you are going to college right?
Now you have something going for yourself, and no one can deny it, or at least that is what they want you to think. At the same time, anyone who is even a bit aware of how terrible that advice is will tell you that this is something (if you are passionate about it) you can pick up as a hobby and learn everything about in less than two years. Giving you zero reasons to waste your energy on it… This is not us saying you should not go to college, this means you should not go to college to learn nonsense that won’t get you anywhere. Easy life and abundance of resources - such as you never have to worry about survival mode (food, shelter, bills…). Leads to mediocre choices. Making multiple mediocre choices in different areas of life? That leads to a mediocre life. Not by design, but because most people don’t know any better - making their advice mediocre. Comfortable is a better way to put it. No doubt some can separate themselves and double down on what works. Usually, things become clearer around the teenage years when you start to form your opinions. Better said, when you begin to question authority or have someone else (or even a resource) who makes you think. Not necessarily to think, but to become aware of what is happening around you. All of these scenarios are important because they allow you to do what others don’t. To question what others overlook and to notice patterns others don’t. Once you start doing this, there’s no coming back.
How does one define mediocrity?
No passion projects or hobbies (a big one that requires a lot of time to realize).
Not looking forward to the future.
Blindly following mainstream advice.
Never question what society is pushing on you.
Not being optimistic.
Falling for social expectations.
Being in the same place as five years ago and still complaining that things never change.
Having a negative outlook on life.
Accepting rules put on you by others who should not be doing so in the first place.
Not taking risks.
Falling for the idea that things will get better without effort.
Taking this for granted (another big one).
Doing things to please others instead of genuinely wanting to.
Not having complete control over your situation.
Letting others dictate how you will live your life.
What should you be afraid of: Before you answer that being mediocre, which is 100% correct. You should be afraid of being the same as everyone else. Not having your own ideas and views on the world. Following the same path as everyone around you is following. Not putting yourself out there because you worry something bad might happen and you will lose it all. Thinking the same as everyone else. Wearing the same clothes as others. Reading and studying the same great figures as others. Afraid of being ignored because no one trusts your vision. Never figuring out what gets you going. Falling into the same lifestyle traps as those around you. Doing things for the approval of others. The list goes on. But you already know what we are aiming at… You don’t want to become part of the herd. You don’t want others to make the most important choices in your life. You don’t want to let others control how you live. What should you be afraid of? You should fear being pushed into mediocrity without even realizing that you are already in it. If you already know that most people around you are mediocre, and you don’t want to be like them. Why would you play the same game as they do?
Mediocrity is everywhere: Since the life we all live is so complex, it is impossible to isolate one scenario. You have to start thinking on a bigger scale. Not only about how you will solve the problem, but also how that same problem will affect other areas. Let's take a basic example that most can relate to. How many times during your school days have you heard: "Those are the rules, you have to follow them". What happens when you constantly reinforce someone from a young age? They can’t think outside the rules. Completely removing creativity, outside the box thinking, and innovation from young people. It does not take a rocket scientist to realize where this leads and what path it takes you down. Thinking the same as everyone else? Mediocrity. What about your job? Has it ever happened to you that you hit all the KPIs, are a top performer, but the cost-cutting had to be done, and your boss tells you, "we will take care of it next year".
Can you see where this leads? You are promised something a year in advance that most likely won’t happen at all, because the next year you will again be hit with a similar excuse for why you can’t get the raise or promotion. Once that passes, your emotions start to take over. You begin relying on short-term thinking and everything that comes with it. Results? The optimism you once had is gone, and those around you become victims because you are unable to show how you feel to those you should. To put it simply, you can't. They have control over you, your cash flow, and what you will eat next month. What should you do if you find yourself in this position? Leave that company behind. Forget about next year's plan, and realize that depending on others who have complete control over you instantly puts you in a mediocre position. There are thousands of examples of how relying on others and society around you can put you in an unfavorable position.
Repeating ourselves, we don't want to have this doomer approach in this post, but it's worth mentioning… There is no one to blame. When you look around, you realize that cheap thrills and escaping reality have never been easier. Video games, betting, streaming sites, and social media are just a few examples of things that numb you down and make you think less. Making it even harder to think about how you are a part of the bigger picture and how you end up in mediocrity. Life feels comfortable, and most people never realize they are already a part of it. We predict that things will only get worse as time goes on… Since life will become even less about thinking and more about offloading your mind to external sources.
Common Scenarios: How Others Push You Into Mediocrity
Common scenarios that most have heard at least once in their lives from different sources and environments. All of these affect your subconscious and the kind of negative programming they cause. They all push you where you don’t want to be. Something to keep in mind and become aware.
Your parents:
The doctors said it was the right thing, so that means you should do it.
If you have good grades, it means you are guaranteed a good job.
College guarantees that you will get a good job and won’t have to worry about anything.
Your friends come from good families, so that means they are good for you - you should be hanging out with them.
Just slow down
Your teachers:
You can’t think outside of the box because there’s a grading system.
Follow the rules.
You can’t do it that way.
Stop questioning authority, we know better than you do.
Your friends:
Take your time off, you deserve it.
Getting a mortgage is normal. Look, everyone is doing it.
It is not worth it, what you have right now is safe - you should stick to it.
It's Wednesday, let's get hammered.
Why would you care about the future?
Please don’t fall for it. It’s a scam.
Your workplace:
You are a hard worker, but this year we had to make some adjustments…
This is a great place to work.
The situation is going to be better.
Let's go for drinks after work, and you will feel better.
Mediocrity is excellence in the eyes of the mediocre. - Joseph Joubert